Confrontation is not easy for anyone, least of all myself. I don't like that form of dealing with issues and it in fact I won't talk to people who do. If you want to talk and exchange thoughts, feelings and ideas in a respectful manner I am willing and happy to talk. I have had on occasion people frustrated with my posts thinking the posts were directed at them. I have seen posts that counter my posts and they are perfectly entitled to their opinion. This is how free speech works without censorship.
The part that raises my eyebrow, when someone wants to express their frustration, is when they start putting conditions on how they want me to react. If the conversations remains respectful I won't push the fact of how they want to control my emotions or not get into a reaction that they may not like. This goes the same for posts an insult or place conditions on what I can or cannot do. I don't do well with condescending or manipulative behaviour. My philosophy is this...Don't go into the bears den unless you are ready for an unpleasant reaction. I do not conform to emotional bribery or conditions and I don't care how angry, hurt or upset you are.
I think we have gotten so far away from good communication and exchange because we are so stuck behind a computer or a smart phone. We have lost the art form of dealing with people using words and taking responsibility for how we feel. Using "I" statements are important. "I feel _________(this) when you said this or did this." "I think I need some space to consider what you have said." I understand and accept what you say but I don't agree. Statements like this takes out accusatory and blaming actions by not using "you".
We all have a right to our feelings and our thoughts as long as we don't belittle someone because of our different views or beliefs. Its also important not to take things personally when people make posts that don't agree with you. As long as emotional conditions and bribery are not a part of it I will hear you out all day long...if it is I can guarantee our connection will never be the same again...or at all.
This is a time of bridging, healing separation and bringing people together. Take a time out or a few days before approaching people with how you feel. There is a difference between reaction and responding. Create time and space to reflect on what you feel...does it belong to you or to them.
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